Here’s what Elon Musk’s ‘SNL’ opening monologue might look like (drafted by the SEC)

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Unlike most of the celebrities chosen to host “Saturday Night Live,” Elon Musk won’t just call you on the phone. It will put it on autopilot. The bar may not be very high for a program in which quarter after quarter does not outperform even its lowest analyst. expectations, but showrunner Lorne Michaels is betting that Musk, whose ego and ambitions cannot be contained by the gravitational pull of the Earth, can supercharge the ratings of the famous variety show to the moon.

When billionaire Tesla TSLA, + 1.35% and the CEO of SpaceX hits the 30 Rock stage on May 8, the live studio audience is likely to be made up of more SEC attorneys than the usual number. Musk proved incapable of bending stubborn regulators in 2018, when he tweeted that he had “secured funds” to turn Tesla private. He paid a fine of 20 million dollars and had to resign as president. In real news: Tesla will report first-quarter earnings amid renewed concerns about its autopilot. That may be little more than a parking ticket for the richest man in the world, but the SEC seems ready to laugh one last time. In addition to an initial draft of a “Flamethrower, flamethrower, flamethrower!” sketch, MarketWatch somehow got the opening monologue prepared by Musk, after it was drafted by the SEC. Michaels may want to put SEC attorneys on the payroll, as the edited opening appears to be the most fun the show has had in years.

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Editor’s Note: We apologize if this attempt at humor did not reach the moon.